Don't Forget - 4 - Hakai-kun

Munou: Incompetent

“Taisa,” Alphonse Elric addressed the dark-eyed man before him. Once again, Al found himself in Roy Mustang’s office. He now understood why his brother never liked coming here to give reports.

“Hm?” Roy grunted at the younger Elric without looking up from his work.

“Taisa,” Al tried again. “I can’t keep lying to my brother. I have to tell him about you.” He now had the colonel’s full attention. “Please, let me tell him. He needs to know.”

Roy was silent while he fiddled with several papers and trinkets on his desk. Al frowned as he waited for his reply. Roy had picked the wrong Elric brother to play the waiting game with. Four and a half years of being a suit of armor had taught Alphonse to be still and patient. Realizing this Roy let out a sigh and ran a hand through his short black hair. “I can’t let you do that, Alphonse-kun.”

“Why? Why not?” Al asked. “Don’t you want him to know?! Don’t you want him to remember?”

“Yes. I do.” Roy said not making eye contact with the boy who sat before him.

“Then why not? He’s suffering!” Al said squeezing his eyes shut. “You’re suffering.”

Roy sighed again. “I can’t let you do that, Alphonse-kun. He needs to remember, yes. But on his own.”

“Why?” Al choked out.

“This may sound selfish, Alphonse-kun,” The Flame Alchemist said, straightening out the sleeve of his coat. “but if you were to tell him about me, everything about him and me, he’d feel obligated. Obligated to have feelings for me. Contrary to popular belief, I wouldn’t want to force anything upon your brother. No, I think it’s best if he remembers on his own, if at all.”

“But, Taisa…” Al tried before being cut of by the colonel.

“If my suspicions are correct,” He said almost dejectedly. “he will never remember.”

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“Why don’t I remember?!” Ed shouted to no one in particular.

Unfortunately, Havoc was the only one in hearing range. “It’s because your brain’s small, like you, chief.” He said ruffling the shorter one’s hair.

Edward growled as he slapped his hand away. “I’m not in the mood.”

“Are you ever?” Havoc joked around the cigarette in his mouth.

The braided boy glared but said nothing. He was done being depressed about the whole ordeal. Anger was easier for him to handle. He sighed. “Am I any different?”

“Pardon?” The older man asked, caught off guard.

“Am I different? From before Al and I left, I mean.”

John Havoc thought about it for a moment. “Well…”he began. “You’re the same as I always remembered you. But about a month or two before you left… that’s when you were different.”

“How?” Ed asked curiously.

“More angry.” Havoc said with a smirk. Ed rolled his eyes and the older military man laughed. “But more often… pleased.”

The braided blonde raised an eyebrow. “Pleased?”

Havoc shrugged. “Yeah… like you were content with life, or something.” Ed stared at him, confused. “I dunno. The others noticed too. No one could quite put their finger on it. I swear Hawkeye knew what it was, but she wouldn’t say. She’d just sorta click her tongue at us and tell us to get back to work.”

“I don’t understand.” Ed said honestly.

“Let’s see… put it this way, when I had a girlfriend awhile back, I was happy. I thought nothing could ruin my life. Sure, she got on my nerves a lot, but more often then not, we were satisfied with ourselves. I could show her my every emotion. There were no secrets between us and she understood me. It was wonderful.”

Edward snorted. “You sound almost like Hughes.”

Havoc chuckled as he gave the young alchemist a teasing punch on his arm. “Tease me if you want, but it’s true. It’s just… something you can’t describe in words.”

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“Hm…” the blond mechanic hummed glancing first at the door before her, the paper in her hands , and then back at the door. Winry ran an unsure hand through her long hair. “I… think this was it…” She gave a soft knock on the door and nearly jumped out of her new boots at the man she saw before her. Big and bulky, he was definitely not one of the Elric brothers. “Uh…”

The man yawned as he scratched the back of his head. “The Elrics?” Winry nodded wordlessly. “Room 609.” With a mumbled ‘thanks’, she was gone.

Only when she was a good distance away from the man did she let out a sigh of relief. Helpful, but scary. Very scary. Too glad to be away from him, she took no notice of where she was going and bumped into a young man clad in a military uniform. “Ah. Sorr--” Winry had to do a double take. “A-Al?”

Al blushed. “Winry, what’re you doing here?”

“I came to check up on you guys.” Winry said starring at his clothes. “Why’re you dressed like that?”

Alphonse rubbed the back of his neck. “Nii-san and I haven’t been able to go shopping for clothes for me. So unless I want to wear Nii-san’s clothes, which are too small, I have to wear this.” Al blushed a deeper shade of crimson as his childhood friend stared wide-eyed at his attire. “D-does it look bad?”

“N-no, not at all.” Winry said tearing her eyes away from the younger teen. She was almost sure that if she were to stare any longer, drool would begin to form at the corner of her mouth.

“I… was just about to head to my room and make lunch. Would you… care to join me?” The tall blonde offered.

“Sure.” Winry exclaimed. “Train food just isn’t quite filling enough. And you know I love your cooking!” Al smiled. His brother would have been proud.

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Edward sighed into the library chairs. He couldn’t concentrate on reading. Lately, he’d just been so restless. In fact, he didn’t feel at all like himself since he’d gotten back to headquarters.

Al was with Winry. It made him smile to see them coming closer like that. As more then friends. But it also gave his heart a sharp tug.

It was a long standing joke that Winry was Ed’s girlfriend. But they all knew that was not true at all. Winry, like Al, had had her heart set on only one. And Edward was happy for his brother and childhood friend. However, that didn’t help the pain in his chest.

He was scared. Scared that Winry would take Al away from him and he’d be left all alone? Since when had the Fullmetal Alchemist been the attached one? No, it wasn’t so much the thought of losing Al to Winry. Rather it was that someone close to him could so easily disturb his quiet little life.

Sure he missed all the action he’d gotten from chasing after the Philosopher’s Stone, but he much rather preferred this peacefulness. Just him, his brother, and every opportunity open to them. If he wanted, he could take Alphonse with him, far away, and maybe the world would forget about the Elric brothers.

But he couldn’t do that. Not to his little brother. Al needed friends. He’d been shunned and alone in that suit of armor far too long. Ed wouldn’t turn him into a hermit.

Edward closed his book and sighed. He was so confused. It was that damn Mustang’s fault, he decided. It was his fault that Ed had forgotten about him. And his fault that a million and one odd questions were whizzing through his head. Why else would he have asked Havoc if he were different or questioned his sexuality? It was much easier to blame Mustang, whom he didn’t really know yet, rather than himself.

Ed decided to check out the book he had been reading on his way out. He figured he’d feel like reading sooner or later. Outside was much warmer then the library. A pleasant warmth that reminded him that, yes, he was still alive. He stretched the kinks out of his arms as he made his way to the main street.

In alchemy, they say a human being is made from the flesh, the mind, and, the soul. Edward and Alphonse Elric knew this well. As a suit of armor, Al had questioned his own existence and whether the memories he held were indeed his own. Fortunately, Winry had pointed out that there was no one fool enough to sacrifice their life to create a “fake little brother”. Al had been convinced. But who would convince Edward now that his memories were real as well? If he didn’t remember this man who was a real as his brother, who was there to say that every other memory he held was fake as well? No one had sacrificed anything for him. The same words Winry had used on Al wouldn’t work this time.

“Hagane no ochibi-san!”

Ed didn’t even have to question who that was trying to pull him back into reality. “I’m no in the mood, Envy.” He said ignoring the Homunculi who currently looked a little like Fury with brown hair and no glasses.

The Sin shifted to his usual form and smirked as he watched Ed continue down the side street. In a flash Envy was in front of the short alchemist. “You look a little troubled.”

Ed frowned at him. “Move. I’m busy.”

“It the man,” Envy said as he shifted forms again. “right?” Edward flinched. He didn’t like being so easy to read. “You’re upset that you don’t remember him.”

Ed snorted. “I don’t care if I remember him or not.”

“Liar.”

The braided teen narrowed his eyes. “Leave me alone.”

“Be honest, Ochibi-san”

“Move!”

Envy smirk widened. “Let me… jog your memory a little…”