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Handle This - lenihanfighter

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Edward stared through the thick haze of rain, long after Mustang had left him. The talk with the Flame Alchemist had left him shocked and feeling empty behind. The young boy didn’t really know what to think of this.

Colonel Roy Mustang would leave Central. After all what they both had gone through, he would leave him, Edward Elric, behind. It was not until then that Edward had realised how much in fact he depended on the aloof and distant Colonel. Next to Al, Mustang was everything in his life.

“Niisan?” Edward didn’t react to Al’s voice. “Niisan, are you alright?” Still no reaction from the Full Metal Alchemist. “They already said you would be here. You’re completely soaked, you know that. Did something happened?”

“He’s going to leave Central.” Somehow, Edward managed to say that in a flat, emotionless tone, although he had no idea how he did that. A tear trickled down from the corner of his eye, mixing with the rain. Yes, Mustang meant much for him, he finally admitted. If the Flame Alchemist would leave… he would have no idea how to continue with his life.

“Niisan…” In a strange, gentle way, Al put his arms around his brother. “If you want to talk to Taisa about this, I saw him walking into the library not that long ago.”

Edward stiffened in the middle of his struggle to break free from his younger brother’s hug. He had no idea anyone knew about his feelings towards the Flame Alchemist. Feelings that might go deeper than just some friendship, feelings he had always been afraid of to admit. Because he might be rejected.

But Al knew about them. And perhaps other people as well.

“I really think you ought to visit him, Niisan,” Al’s earnest voice continued. “And have a talk together. I know you’re upset now, but you’ll understand it better when you know the reason.”

The reason… He already knew the reason. He didn’t want anymore reasons. He wanted that Mustang stayed. He wanted to stay with Mustang, even if this meant he had to leave Central as well.

Edward suddenly broke free and he stumbled forward, but soon, he was in a smooth run. Al had said the Flame Alchemist was in the library. Edward hoped fervently he would still be in the library.

Panting heavily, and dripping from the rain, he entered the State Library. Some of the librarians greeted him politely, others more affectionately, but he heard none of them. His feet stepped quickly through the stacks of books, his golden eyes searching for a trace of Mustang.

Mustang, of course, was at his usual spot, safely between three stacks and a wall. Only a narrow opening between two stacks made it possible to enter the small spot. The Colonel’s eyes were focused on the window and he stood rigid, even sternly. He made no indication he had heard the young boy, not even when Edward shuffled with his feet over the floor to draw attention.

“Do you really have to leave?” he finally asked, for once in a small, quiet voice.

“We’ve already talked that over, Full Metal,” the older man replied. “You know the reason.”

“I just…” Words were stuck in his throat and looked helplessly at the back of the man he had always secretly admired. How could he ever explain his feelings? What use would it have to explain them to someone like Mustang?

                         You said it once before,
                         You don’t do those things you used to anymore.
                         You say in doubt,
                         We’re fading out, forgetting who we used to be.


Mustang stiffened when he heard Edward’s voice, remembering the words he had said several months ago. He had never thought the boy had heard him.

                         ‘Cause I will bring you down,
                         I don’t want to miss,
                         I don’t think you can handle this.
                         You’ve lost what you can’t find;
                         It’s never what you had in mind.


Edward’s expression had turned serious as he walked towards the Flame Alchemist, continuing with his song.

                         You take it with a smile;
                         It’s so easy when you’re always in denial.
                         Just in time, but out of line,
                         I can’t make all the same mistakes you want me to.


He had laid a hand on the Colonel’s shoulder and Mustang looked away, somehow deeply hurt by Edward’s words. He was right, the Flame Alchemist knew. But he’d rather die than that he admitted that to anyone.

                         ‘Cause I will bring you down,
                         I don’t want to miss,
                         I don’t think you can handle this.
                         You’ve lost what you can’t find;
                         It’s never what you had in mind.


Edward’s voice died away and his hand fell limply beside his body. There was a long silence, not one of them knowing how to break it.

Finally, Mustang turned his back to the boy. “You know it’s not like that. I can do this mission, I have to. There’s no choice. Don’t start to get all sentimental about it, Full Metal. That doesn’t suit you.”

“I’m NOT being sentimental about this, Mustang!” Edward breathed heavily. “You don’t listen to me, do you? You never listen to anyone. You just do what you want to do. Why don’t you-”

“Enough!” Mustang raised his hand to order the boy to silence. “We’ve talked it over. Accept the choice.” He started to walk away, but Edward’s voice held him back.

                         You’re giving up, you know, it’s not what you need.

The Colonel whirled around, looked at the golden hair falling over a red, long coat. What Full Metal’s expression was, was a mystery to him, since the boy stood with his back to him. But his voice was accusingly and that was enough for Roy to make him feel guilty.

                         And it’s true what you’re going through.
                         Try so hard not listen to
                         Everything I never say.


With more passion than before and a slight annoyance in his voice, Edward continued,

                         ‘Cause I will bring you down,
                         I don’t want to miss,
                         I don’t think you can handle this.
                         ‘Cause I will bring you down,
                         I don’t want to miss,
                         I don’t think you can handle this.
                         You’ve lost what you can’t find;
                         It’s never what you had in mind.


Another one of those long silences in which both parties had no idea what they had to say. Mustang opened his mouth a few times, but closed it again when he came to the conclusion there was nothing left to say.

At last, he sang, in his deep, rich voice,

                         I’m getting over getting used to,
                         And after all that I put you through,
                         Now I see I’m not the only one.
                         Never thought it’d ever come to,
                         This in fact was never what you
                         Wanted from me or how you meant it to be.


Edward looked at the Flame Alchemist, who at his turn, stared at his own hands. He took a few, hesitantly steps towards Mustang, unsure if he understood what was just said. “Taisa…”

Roy Mustang looked down at the boy, repeating his part of the song while he put his arms around Edward’s shoulders.

                         I’m getting over getting used to,
                         And after all that I put you through,
                         Now I see I’m not the only one.


His arms glided down to the blond’s waist.

                         Never thought it’d ever come to,
                         This in fact was never what you
                         Wanted from me or how you meant it to be.


The Colonel’s voice trailed off, but his arms remained where they were and strangely enough, Edward didn’t mind it.

“Don’t leave me behind. I don’t know how I have to live further.” For perhaps the first time in his life, the Full Metal Alchemist looked pleadingly up. The elder man glanced back, losing himself in the golden eyes of the young boy. “I… You mean everything for me, Mustang,” Edward finally confessed, clutching firmly at the Colonel’s arms. “If you leave, there’s no reason for me to continue with living. You’re twice as old, you could’ve been a father, but still… I… I…” The words remained unspoken, but for once it seemed the other listened to him.

“Yes, it’s a bit weird,” Mustang admitted. “But you’re not alone in this.” He pulled the boy closer to him and softly started to stroke his back. “I still have to go.”

“Take me with you,” the boy pleaded.

“That’s impossible. You have to stay here.”

“Mustang!!!” Two golden eyes, filled with doubt and uncertainty, looked up at him.

“I’m sorry, Full Metal, but I can’t allow you to come with me.”

“Is it that dangerous?” Edward asked sadly, his arms sliding down, falling limply beside his body.

“Dangerous?” Mustang laughed his own, superior laugh. “I never said it would be dangerous. What makes you think it’s dangerous?”

“We State Alchemists always get the dirty jobs. We always have to do all the tricky and hazardous missions. If it’s not life-threatening, they wouldn’t send a State Alchemist. Right?” Suddenly unsure, Edward glanced up at the faintly amused grin on Mustang’s face. He had never liked the grins on the Colonel’s face, and he definitely didn’t like this particulair one.

“No, as a matter of fact, it’s quite safe,” the Flame Alchemist told him, still grinning amused. “Boring, perhaps, but safe. There’s going to be a party in the South, which all high-ranking officers, including me, are supposed to attend. There’ll be formalities and speeches, but I don’t think they’re ‘life-threatening’ or ‘tricky’, as you perhaps want to think.”

It took a while before Edward realised what had just been said. His face turned bright red and he pushed Mustang away. “SO THAT’S ALL THAT YOU’RE GOING TO DO?! YOU’RE GOING TO A PARTY?!?!”
A fanfiction by ~lenihanfighter.

Pairings: A slight Roy/Edward pairing

Genres: Angst/Romance/Humor

This fanfiction is written by ~ lenihanfighter. All rights and copyright dealing with the storyline belong to her.
All characters of FMA belong to their rightful owners.
"Handle This" and the lyrics belong to Sum 41.
© 2004 - 2024 fma-fanfic-club
Comments3
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ganimyde's avatar
I agree with hoolijing. What a nice ending.